Fandom: Super Junior
Pairing: SiHae (SiwonXDonghae), featuring Yoona
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst, Romance, Slash
Disclaimer: Story is fictional
Note: Written in Donghae's POV
                                        The Bird and The Fish

losing my innocence

by Jarield Lunel de Mourcerf

Chapter 2 

Great! Just great! I really hate this day. Good thing it’s about to end and I’m finally home. I still keep on thinking again of the stupid bastard. If only I could erase him in my mind. But then again, it made me think of Yoona. Oh what the hell did I do? You screwed big time Donghae.

Lying in my bed, staring at the ceiling; that is all I’m doing right now. Or more like what I could do. I had lost all my interest in doing other activities besides this. Or maybe, I also did lose my energy. I really wanted to sleep, rest, forget everything and shut my world. If only I could. Then I heard a knock on the door. Great! Now someone is coming to disturb me.

“I’m busy right now” I yelled.

“It’s me.” I heard someone said behind the door. I was able to recognize the voice immediately
I got up and open the door. I saw Yoona standing in front of me carrying a back pack. Neither of us talk, I simply move sideways as she entered my room.

“What are you doing here?” I asked initiating a conversation.

“I’m going to sleepover tonight. It’s your turn right?” She answered me innocently.

“It’s not saturday yet dummy” I said as I closed the door. Then there was silence. The atmosphere between has became more awkward.

“I’m sorry.” I heard her said in almost a whisper. Oh Yoona, my precious Yoona. It’s all that stupid, bastard, son of a bitch Choi Siwon’s fault!

“What are you apologizing for? You did not do anything to me.” I blurted.

“Yeah, you’re right! You should be the one apologizing.” she yelled at me.

“What?”

“Didn’t I told you to be kinder with Siwon? But what did you do? You punched the guy I love.” She demanded. What the hell!

“Hey... Hey…” I uttered, then I was shut by Yoona’s sob and tears. He came to me still crying as she embraced me. I’m such a jerk, this is the time when she needed me the most. This is the time that I should be by her side.

“Thank you…” she whispered as we are still in the tight embrace. We finally let go of each other; and I finally saw her smile. That made me smile too.

“I’m such an idiot aren’t I Hae?” she said trying to smile.

“No, you’re just madly in love…” I told her.

“You should have punched me instead of him. I might come into my senses then.” Yoona said.

“Okay you wish for it.” I said as I slap her mildly in her head. She pouted cutely, I laugh at her.

“You know what? Let’s eat some ice cream” I suggested. Her pout turned into a small smile. She sure was forcing it.

This wasteful day ended good after all. I think. We had lots of fun all night. I think. We watched some series. We still have not finished Stargate: Atlantis. I love the Stargate series, I hope someday I could go to the different galaxies and meet the aliens like in the series. Then, we played some video games; and of course we eat sweets.

It’s funny, that despite our age, we still do a lot childlike stuffs. But actually we really did grow up; because we fell in love. Only I wish it is mutual; because she fell in love with a bad guy. Yoona and I slept in one bed that night; I looked at her sleeping face. It does look different now; she looks so peaceful sleeping. Usually she has her mouth open; it’s so funny. But despite her peacefulness; I noticed some tears dripping from her eyes. She’s crying even in her sleep. At that moment, I want to cry as well.

I woke up the following morning with Yoona’s mouth wide opened. When she woke up, she smiled at me. Yes, it is one of the warmest things in this world. But something in her smile still show traces of sorrow. I look into the sun with the hope that everything will be okay.

----------

No one in school talked about the circumstances occurred. It’s really unexpected; I thought many will be curious about Siwon and Yoona’s break-up. But luckily, no one bothered to ask. Come to think of it, everything about Siwon is a taboo in school. Seems everybody is afraid of him. Yoona seems to be doing fine; she and Siwon obviously are no longer together and treat each other as strangers. Siwon is rumored to have another girl. He really is such a player.

I looked at both of my sides. I sighed at the sight; there were no longer pieces of paper messages which I have to pass from my right to left. There were no longer occasional winks from the bastard, and there were no longer giggles from Yoona. Things had changed in an instant and went back how it was use to be. How it should be. Siwon has become a total stranger to us, Yoona and I remained bestfriends; until…

----------

I never saw it coming nor I knew that it already came. He is like a cyclone that I thought has passed but returned with his sweet vengeance.

I am walking towards one of the bookshelf looking for a particular book. I had read it many times already; and I know exactly where I could find it. I finally arrived at the part where I know it was located and looked for it. But so it happens, the book isn’t there. I tried looking for it across the bookshelf. Maybe someone might have misplaced it. I checked every inch of the shelf looking for the book, but I’m still unsuccessful. Until I finally came to the near end; and I noticed a human figure sitting in the floor. At first glance he seemed to be reading a certain book; but when you look at him more closely. He is actually sleeping, but what is more surprising is that the figure turned out to be Choi Siwon.

I became curious about Siwon that I consciously move closer to him. I keenly observed him; seeing at his sleeping figure is actually very fun.

‘You really have a handsome face. No wonder there are lots of girls who adore you. But evil is still evil. But to be honest, you look quite angelic when you sleep. Who knows you could exude kindness in you. Well, maybe only when you are sleeping that is.’ I smiled in my thoughts. What the Heck! I just can’t smile while thinking of Siwon? That is unaccepatable!

I keep on staring Siwon in his sleep; somehow it seems that I may also have been drowned to him. I think I am staring too much; for sure I am that I keep on doing it. Even when Siwon woke up I stay in my position. And I have to witness him waking up too.

He still had not fully opened his eyes yet. He was tilting his head to the sides while his eyebrows twitched with the movement. He rubbed his eyes with his two hands, and finally opened his eyes fully. That’s when I realized how close my face is to his. Siwon smiled, it is damn awkward that I faced to my side to avoid such eye contact.

“Fishy, you like watching me sleep?” Siwon said and his voice is full of amusement. Damn he really is irritating, calling me again in my nickname. Since when did I give him the right to call me that again? Yeah, never!

“Yeah sure, I need to observe you so I could plot how I could murder you perfectly.” I said looking at him with a glare. And just when I was going to rise I felt strong arms pulling me. And before I knew it, Siwon was embracing me tightly that I have to tilt my head upward. His arms are just big enough to lock me in. One of his arms was covering my upper back grasping my right shoulder; while the other was holding into my waist.

“Keep quiet. We are in the library” Siwon whispered.

“I’m not saying anything.” I whispered. We remained in that position until I heard silent chuckles coming from the bastard. That was when I tried to finally get loose from his embrace pushing my body with my hands that are intact to his chest. Siwon surprisingly let go of me. He continued on laughing silently as we stood.

“Stop it will you? We are in the library. Keep quiet” I said trying to control my voice while this bastard Siwon continue in his chuckles. That is the time I noticed the book he is holding. That is exactly the book that I was looking for. So it was with him all this time; now I have more reasons to hate him! He stole my book!

“Hey, are you reading that book?” I casually asked.

“This one?” he said raising the book “You’re interested with this?” Siwon asked. I did not oblige myself to answer him.

“Don’t be ashamed, I know you had been reading this” He said teasing me. “This is your doing right?” He said showing me a doodle in one of the pages of the book. My eyes widened; it really was my doing. Sometimes; I just can’t control my hands.

“And I also found this. This is also your doing right?” he showed me this time a piece of paper where there is something written there. I know exactly what it is, it’s my poetry composition.

“Give me that.” I commanded him.

“Nah, finder’s keepers” he said as he walked towards the shelf and placed the book into its rightful place

“Folktales. I never knew you have such interest.” Siwon said to me.

“Same goes with you.” I counter attacked.

“We might have something in common then” he told me with a smile and walked away leaving standing totally oblivious.

----------

It seems god got his new supply of beer and pop corn today and he was in the mood to play game. Because I swear, for days, I never knew that that Siwon guy existed. Well, not literally, I mean I never cared about him since that incident. And now, I can’t believe that I realized I have another seatmate besides Yoona. He does not exist! He does not exist! But Choi Siwo exists!

I hate him, especially those bushy thick eyebrows of him which are raised way up high by the mean time. Damn, he really has scary eyebrows. Now his eyebrows are meeting forming a letter ‘V’. Who knows that this guy has such a talent; and he looks really funny. Shit! I’m in class. I shouldn’t laugh. I covered my mouth tightly making sure there won’t be any sound. Siwon seems to notice me. Damn! He’s totally staring me with that his eyebrows of his that are still shaped like V. It’s a lot funnier when you see it directly. Damn bastard, you are not helping at all.

----------

Just when I thought I finally got rid of Siwon. Even outside school; he was still following. Swear! The guy is officially a leech! Well, this was the first time actually, but what really matters is that he was also here. Here’s the deal. I want to cool my head by playing basketball by myself. So I went to this particular covered court I always go to. It was an old court and only few goes there, maybe I’m the only one actually. It was like my secret haven, my territory, you get the point? But who did I found the moment I get there? It’s none other than the bastard Siwon. I know I should have gone to soccer field instead. Even if there are more people there; at least there will be no bastard there.

“Hey! Are you here to play?” That was Siwon, he finally noticed my presence.

“I was; but I changed my mind.” I told him.

“Why? The atmosphere is just good for playing.” he said smiling.

“You’re already using it. I’ll just go now.” I said.

“You already got here! It would be a waste. Besides, the court is big enough for the two of us. You can use the other side.” He said presenting the left part of the court with such ahmm gentlemanish way?

Come to think of it; the bastard has a point. And besides; why would I be the one going. I mean, this is my court! No, not really mine. But I had been playing here for years. And who cares if he’s here; he does not exist on the first place. He’s just another stranger. No, he’s just a wind.

“Okay, just remember to mind your own business.” I told him.

“Right fishy!” he said as we proceed to our own routine.

So I had been playing alone in this half court for minutes now; but I can’t help to notice Siwon on the other side. Really, he plays well. I had seen him play before; but you just can’t help but be amazed in him. I’m not pretty bad myself to be honest; but I’m not as good as him. His stance and posture are good; and he does 3 point shots and lay-ups effortless, damn he could even dunk! Donghae, stop with the admiration; you gotta have fun. You can’t lose to this giant. Since when did it this became a competition?

“Lee Donghae!” I heard someone call me. I looked to where the voice is coming from as I see an object going towards me. Luckily, I was able to catch it.

“You’re quite good. You should have joined the basketball team.” That is Siwon talking and what I am holding right now is actually his ball; his expensive and new ball. I wish I could own a ball like this. Maybe all I have to do now is run away with his ball.

“Hey, aren’t we suppose to not mind each other’s business.” I said to him.

“Yah, but it is no fun playing alone.” he whined childishly.

“Better than playing with you.” I said tossing the ball back to him. Oh, that precious ball. But my dignity as a man is more important to me.

“You chicken out?” He shouted “You’re just afraid you’ll lose to me. We both know that I’m a better player between the two of us.” Siwon ended. “You simply can’t admit your defeat; you’ll eventually lose to me anyway.” Siwon said as he backfaced me.

Of course, he’ll win against me. He’s a freaking master in this sports. Okay, I just admitted defeat? No! Lee Donghae should not admit defeat! And as for Choi Siwon, You can’t just insult me like that and get away with it. My rational part tells me to back out because you know, he’s a jerk and jerks should not be fed. If I take up his challenge, I will just do him favor right? So no… But… But…

“Bring it on!” Damn you man pride!

Siwon grinned very amused that things are turning his way “You sure Fishy? I mean, I’m going to crash you.” He said smugly.

“Do you want to play or not?!”

There is no way I’m going to let him get away from this. Be prepared Choi Siwon! I’m going to bring you down! I’m going to win this game and humiliate you in the sports you love the most! I’m gonna be the last man standing! And I’m gonna have the last laugh! HAHAHAHA! I just wish that god has run out of beer and pop corn tonight, or even at least one of those two…

Author’s Note: I don’t know what to say actually… Maybe ahmmm… Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed the chapter?... I love you!!! *in a non creepy and totally platonic kind of way*